LIFESTYLE | What If?

What If I am Pregnant?

Hello lovelies! 

Just to quickly point out, dad etc I am NOT pregnant, my mind just likes to play tricks on me.

There is a lot of pressure on girls these days, SCHOOL, UNI, CAREER CAREER CAREER, and hearing all sorts of things such as “you’re too young” for certain situations and I think because of all of this chat, I have had a fear of becoming pregnant ever since I probably started my period. My most popular post ever on my blog was about my experience with the Contraceptive Implant, something the doctors and I decided would be best, in order to battle these fears. I also love how much I have helped people with that post, quite a lot of you have said you have too got yourself the implant after reading my post – I hope life has improved for you since you got it! 

I was the kind of girl that had scared herself so much after reading all sorts of stories on the internet, that she thought she could get pregnant from like a bus seat. Obviously you can’t… I am sure I am not alone here, and that many of you are afraid of becoming pregnant, which is why I felt it was important to address this subject today on my blog. It’s not that I don’t want children EVER, I just don’t wish to have them at this point in my life. 

What If I am Pregnant?

The implant is absolutely great, it has totally changed my life. The only problem, is that I don’t get regular periods – I really miss having these periods in a structured manner, plus periods are the *you aren’t pregnant* monthly reminder that I am sure you girls hate, but also love at the same time. The thing with contraception methods is they work because they TRICK your own body into thinking you are already pregnant, and therefore can’t get pregnant again. That is what is happening at the moment, I FEEL pregnant, I’m so convinced that I am pregnant for the majority of the year because it genuinely feels like there is something going on in my body. Constant bloating, urges to wee all the time, itchy / sore boobs – the list is endless!

I know these are symptoms for all sorts of issues, but with my OCD mind I can’t help but use those two words…

What If. 

What if I’m pregnant? I know I have an implant, but it is only 99% effective – What if I am the 1% that it doesn’t work on? It will get to a point that these questions get all too much, and I act on my compulsion of buying and using a pregnancy test. That will calm my mind for a bit, but really not long at all. What if it was a dodgy pack and the test didn’t work, What if I have tested too early and there isn’t enough of the hormone to detect it on the test – etc etc, my thoughts are endless. 

When I have calmed down and have managed to convince myself I am not pregnant, my mind will THEN move onto other things, why does my stomach always hurt, why are my boobs itchy and sore… What if it’s breast cancer? 

Thats the thing with OCD. It is all about the ‘WHAT IF’ – What if I haven’t locked the door? What if I left my straighteners on? What if I have dangerous germs on myself? What if I accidentally put bleach in someones food? What if, what if, what if. I worry too much about the future…. I want to live more IN THE MOMENT, IN THE NOW. Why do I worry about things that haven’t even happened, and might never ever happen? This is something I hope to work on over the next few months. 

If any of you have ever purchased a pregnancy test, you will know how intimidating it can be going up to the till with the box in your hand, especially if you still look about 16, like me, you can get some really interesting looks! This is why I love shopping online on Superdrug. You can purchase any of these items that you might feel embarrassed to usually purchase, from the ease of your own home. 

Also, did you know if you have a Superdrug Health & Beauty card (if not, why not?!) you can get FREE standard delivery on all orders – it is amazing, and super super helpful. I thought I might mention it in this post because I know not a lot of people know about this fact, I know it has changed my life! I love online shopping but I absolutely hate paying for delivery, I will do anything normally to reach the minimum spend – so I hope you find this little face useful!

Can any of you relate to this post? Do let me know in the comments! 

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*This post contains gifted items, however all life rambles are my own*

13 Comments

  1. August 4, 2016 / 4:25 pm

    You can still get your period and be pregnant my grandmother didn't even know she was pregnant and she was still getting periods 🖒

  2. August 4, 2016 / 4:25 pm

    You can still get your period and be pregnant my grandmother didn't even know she was pregnant and she was still getting periods 🖒

  3. August 4, 2016 / 4:53 pm

    I absolutely loved this post. I've never had sex with a man so definitely don't have the pregnancy what ifs but I certainly have that about other things so I totally understand. I have Generalised Anxiety Disorder rather than OCD but it sounds like it behaves in a similar way.
    What ifs are the story of my life.
    V ❤
    http://sirvikalot.wordpress.com/blog

  4. August 4, 2016 / 4:54 pm

    I absolutely loved this post. I've never had sex with a man so definitely don't have the pregnancy what ifs but I certainly have that about other things so I totally understand. I have Generalised Anxiety Disorder rather than OCD but it sounds like it behaves in a similar way.
    What ifs are the story of my life.
    V ❤
    http://sirvikalot.wordpress.com/blog

  5. August 4, 2016 / 4:55 pm

    Great post I think a lot of girls can relate to! I had a what if moment and it turned out to be positive, sadly things didn't turn out to plan but I can relate to this post several times over. Having necessary contraception is so important and if you feel like your body or habits are changing, it's worth getting a test just to put your mind at ease.

    To Gems comment, completely true – my aunt didn't know she was pregnant until 7 months as her body barely changed and she still had her period!

    Tamsyn Elizabeth | Peaches and Bear

  6. August 4, 2016 / 5:04 pm

    Forgive me if I'm wrong, but typically, if I was experiencing symptoms like you're describing.. Sore boobs, bloating etc, my GP would tell me I need to try a different contraceptive method as it wasn't working properly if I got those symptoms. I had the implant for about 6 months and at first I thought wow this is so good, I won't forget to take the pill etc, I feel so safe. But after a short while I started feeling sick, I gained weight, I was bloating all the time and worst of all, my mood swings were spectacular. I would be crying one minute, lashing out the next and happy a few minutes later. I had to get it taken out. I went to the GP, described what was going on and they said it's totally not normal to react like that, and removed it straight away. After trying about 8 different pills, the implant and the patch, I finally found a pill I got on with. Regular withdrawl bleeds, no period pain, no headaches, no tenderness, no weight gain, mood was levelled out and everything worked fine!

    It kind of sounds like you're having a reaction to the levels of hormones in the implant, if you're feeling bloated and tender, I would go see your GP and explain what's going on, and they might say, actually, it's not for you. It takes a full 3 months with a certain method for your body to get used to it and show any reactions to it or accept it. My friend had the same reaction to her pill too, and has now found another one which works fine for her. I would definitely look into other methods as it really sound like you're getting on with it xx

  7. August 4, 2016 / 7:33 pm

    Fab post, and great that you can write about everything you're feeling with such a positivity! The implant never worked for me because I bled like crazy, but I definitely miss the assurance that it gave in terms of pregnancy. Three years is a long time! I'm now on the patch and can be a little anal about it if it creases because it's less effective if it comes off at all, but overall it's a good method for me now. The pill is just an endless circle of 'what ifs' for me!

    Megan / Lazy Thoughts

  8. August 4, 2016 / 9:24 pm

    Great post! I've convinced myself I was pregnant so many times but thankfully it doesn't pop into my head as much anymore! I do still believe that I'm going to be one of those people that's 7 months pregnant and clueless though haha x

  9. August 4, 2016 / 9:27 pm

    I have OCD and a lot of what ifs too! Bought a tonne of tests before and they've all been negative but your brain runs away like, I must be pregnant because I've been extra tired etc. I also think when I do a test, oh what if the hormone isn't strong enough for the test to tell. All the questions in my brain. Kinda good to know people think the same as you though! Xx

  10. August 8, 2016 / 7:19 pm

    I had this scare the other week! Sucked, and I'm not pregnant that GOD but I did have bigger boobs for like a week, woohoo! Hahaha. Glad to know that others have been through the same.

    Sarah | scarletstate.co.uk

  11. August 9, 2016 / 1:53 pm

    I'm the total opposite. Desperately want to get pregnant but finding it nowhere near as easy as others. But I can relate to the what if scenario. If my period is late I get to wondering if I'm pregnant, then a negative test, so what is wrong with me. What if I have cancer. What if I can't ever have kids. Etc etc. It's horrid!! x http://www.aimeeraindropwrites.co.uk x

  12. August 28, 2016 / 3:33 pm

    I can 100% relate to this post – I have the coil to help lessen my periods as they are so heavy. But I have OCD and anxiety and continually fear may get pregnant (my bf and I are always safe) but those two conditions always make me believe my coil isn't in correctly or it's fallen out or it's in to make me pregnant. My body always makes me feel like I'm pregnant and have been told I have phantom pregnancies – sometimes I hate being a woman! xo

    hayleyloves.uk

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