Wednesday, 8 July 2015

LIFESTYLE | A Little Life Chat, From Me To You

A little personal lifestyle chat tea and cake Victoria Sponge
Photo taken by the lovely Sophie <3 
Hello lovelies!

I think today might well turn into quite an emotional rambly… but I guess that is just how I am feeling this week! I really apologise in advance if the post seems like it just doesn’t make sense... you are seriously having the raw cut, straight from my brain right now, as if we were sat down in a coffee shop together, with a lovely hot drink, and a big slab of cake, just talking about life. Me to you.

University is a great experience, it really really is, and I would recommend it to anyone, I really, really, really would…….

But.

All I can say is, University can just be SUCH an EMOTIONAL ROLLERCOASTER.

I find I feel quite anxious and on edge throughout the University year because I constantly just want to do my BEST and stress out if I don’t achieve what I expect to. But to be honest, this part of University didn’t surprise me - all the deadlines and everything were expected. However what I am talking about today is something you don’t really think about when you send off your shiny UCAS application…. And that is SAYING GOODBYE.

Summertime is such a wonderful time, but also such a sad time. You get the freedom from deadlines (that you have literally been wishing for your LIFE, for the last 9 months) BUT it is that time of year where you have to say bye to your University friends. WHAT? I don’t get to live with my best friends for three WHOLE months?! How does one survive….. Who am I going to have pizza with at 3am? Who am I going to talk to when I am feeling sad at ANY HOUR?  

But all is okay, because you know you are going to see them again soon and living with them, literally attached to the hip in no time.

Not this time.

I joined University in 2012 and now it is 2015, it marks the year of graduation. (With courses being typically 3 years long) I am doing a four year course, but a lot of the people I know were doing three year courses which means they will be leaving Leeds this year SOB SOB SOB. It saddens me so much that a few of my besties aren’t going to be in Leeds, they are going out there into the big old world looking for jobs, it is such a weird feeling because we started this experience together, but we aren’t finishing it together. (& gosh I know they feel sad for leaving too) I feel I shouldn’t be here without them. I KNOW I will see them again soon. I find I am fine when I have events booked in the calendar to meet up with them, I feel in life I get upset about the unknown quite a lot. Having the time scheduled in the future pleases my mind a lot, and gives me something to look forward to. 

Just over a week ago my boyfriend moved out of our accommodation. And that was WEIRD. I have lived with him since first year in halls, so you can imagine how strange it is for me now that he isn’t going to live with me. I won’t lie. A bit of space really has done wonders I think. I am literally SO excited to see him next week at his graduation and you can imagine that excitement bubble kind of dies when you see someone everyday. But like I said, it is all okay at the moment because I have this scheduled in, so we will probably have to have something planned in immediately after to put my mind at rest and to look forward to. It is so hard to go from living together then totally switching it up to long distance :(

I think I am just the kind of person who sometimes finds it hard to accept that life moves on. You aren’t going to be friends with the same people forever, life moves on, people move around the country / world, you change as a person whilst meeting all sorts of different people along the way. I hardly talk to anyone who I used to hang out with a lot at A-Level age, but that is life I guess! Sometimes it is just not meant to be.

The main reason I am writing this post is because I am coming towards the end of my year in industry this week. Friday is my last day working for the University of Leeds, and I have honestly loved my year so much. I have learnt so many skills, grown as a person and met some wonderfully fabulous people. I know how much I am going to HATE saying goodbye, even though I am going to meet up with them still next year, it doesn’t matter, I will still be SO sad. You can bet your bottom dollar that I am going to absolutely BALL my eyes out on Friday, and at my leaving do tonight actually! 

Yes. I am THAT girl. I am absolutely pants at saying goodbye. I really am.
- DO not look at me in the eye (I can’t do this, it makes me weep)
- YES that is my lip wobbling uncontrollably
- Try not to talk too much about what is happening either hahaha.

Basically, saying goodbye is POO, I wish we never had to do it! Saying goodbye just isn’t a comfortable human emotion. I hate saying goodbye to my dad at the train station when I go back to Uni, I hate saying bye at the end of relationships, falling out with friends, I hate saying goodbye to my friends / boyfriends at the train station. Gosh aren’t train stations horrible places to be! I just don’t like not seeing the people I love and care about for prolonged periods!

However, sometimes saying goodbye is a good thing. Saying goodbye to my nan last year when she sadly passed away was the most heart breaking thing I have ever gone through, but the closure was also what I needed, and I am so glad I visited her in the chapel of rest, a very very sad, but very much needed moment. One that I will cherish forever.

Hope you enjoyed this post lovelies, Can you relate to this, do you hate saying goodbye? Or am I the only one who literally can’t look someone in the eye when I say bye, without wanting to ball my eyes out! (Obviously only works over a prolonged period… I won’t cry if I am going to see you later that day or something, that would be silly!!!

*Sorry for the ramble, our drink is probably very cold now!!*

Love you lots, 

Kayleigh xoxo

*if you enjoyed this post you might also like Feeling Thankful and Lucky or Goodbye Nasty Inner Voice 
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11 comments

  1. Such a beautiful post and beautifully written! Xxx

    Anisha ♥ All You Need Is Red Lipstickl

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  2. I am actually sobbing right now, this is such a heartfelt and beautiful post and it makes me just want to weep and weep! One, about all the people I have to say goodbye to at the moment but two, also about all the amazing memories I've had over the last three years. You write so so well! Lots and lots of love xxxxx

    Sarah www.whatsasssays.com

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  3. lovely post Kayleigh! I hate saying goodbye to anyone when i know i wont see them for a while and always cry my eyes out! And then when i see them again,i cry even more xx

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  4. If it makes you feel any better I left uni last year and I still speak to and see most of my uni friends! Sometimes we have to put up with whatsapp or Skype but its worth it and I've met loads of lovely new people so rather than losing friends I have just maintained and gained!!! :P x

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  5. you absolute little doll! this is a sweet post and although some of your friends are leaving i am very glad you're sticking around! long distance is difficult but you'll be fine, a bit of space is always good and 'absence makes the heart grow fonder' as they say...! x

    http://the-dress-diaries.blogspot.co.uk

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  6. Aw Kayleigh I just want to give you a big hug!! I know exactly how you feel I've graduated two years ago and had to say goodbye to some of my favourite people but I wouldn't change the experience for the world! Everything will fall into place I'm sure :) www.sunnydei.con

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  7. Aww Kayleigh what an adorable post! It has been a massive journey and learning curve this year and I know I was the same when I was leaving my placement- I couldn't look at anyone or talk properly because I could feel the tears coming and choking me up! Such a beautifully written post- you put your emotions into words so well :) can't wait for September, graphics buddy! Lots of love xxx

    EMMABYDESIGN.

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  8. I feel the exact same everytime I go back to University! I'm so close with my family and dread it everytime I have to leave them again. Hope you enjoy your last year though! X

    The Fashion Road

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  9. Aaaww your too adorable! Loved reading this..

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