Tuesday, 2 June 2015

LIFESTYLE | Goodbye Excessive Unnecessary Alcohol

Lifestyle Blogger Personal Post Ditching Alcohol

Hello lovelies!

I will admit I have really struggled motivating myself to blog this week, partly due to feeling really down and also partly due to the fact that I just couldn't decide on what to post about next! I have too many ideas at the moment! And you know that good old procrastination technique, where rather than tackling that large list of yours and solving your problems, you avoid them.... not helpful!  

So with this struggle in mind... I thought I would just speak about what is on my mind right now. I feel I can't really speak this in person to anyone because I would probably stutter and get a little bit upset, which is kind of why I have and love my blog so much.

I feel there are quite a lot of blog posts these days in the bloggersphere about reducing or cutting out alcohol all together. I don't know whether it is to do with age, or the realisation that it really isn't too 'cool' to get absolutely hammered every night.

Now, don't get me wrong, I do love a girly night out with a few cocktails (my Instagram shows....) and this is perfectly fine. What isn't fine, are the nights out with the excessive over drinking where you just slightly cross over that line.

I don't enjoy these nights out anymore. 

They might be all fun and giggles for about an hour or so, and maybe sometimes they are needed to let off a bit of steam, but that is all.  I don't like how I feel in the morning,  I don't like not remembering anything and most importantly,  I don't like myself as a person.

Recently I wrote a post about how I have been feeling recently, you can find that here. I spoke about 'angry / sad' Kayleigh kind of taking over 'happy' Kayleigh's life. Which is all very true, but far more apparent, after maybe a little bit too much to drink.

On Friday night I had one of these nights. And on Saturday I had one of these horrible days. I came home after this night out and I apparently said some truly disgusting, nasty things to my boyfriend that I have absolutely no recollection of saying at all.

He told me what I said on Saturday and it made me cry, a lot. I guess alcohol over exaggerates any emotions you might be feeling at the time, and blows your feelings out of proportion. For example, if I was feeling unhappy with him for whatever reason, alcohol would come along and storm all over the situation. He is fine and forgave me and I am truly grateful for that, however I am not fine with it. I wouldn't have forgiven me. I feel really sad about it all and it just makes me not like myself as a person. This was all down to the nasty devil, too. much. drink. 

Lifestyle Blogger Personal Post Ditching Alcohol Afternoon Tea Hilton Double Tree Sky Lounge

Also, feeling absolutely dreadful on the Saturday due to my horrible hangover was not the ideal day. Sorry to the poor lovely Leeds bloggers that had to put up with me moaning at our afternoon tea event at the Double Tree Hilton Sky Lounge - love you girls! After a lovely day with these girls I got home and my anxiety levels just continued to rise.

I hate not remembering the events of the night before. I like to be fully in control of my situation and surroundings. I remember parts, and the rest is kind of hazed, and this is not enough for me. I pretty much start imagining scenarios, the 'what if's' of the night. It often makes me wonder how I get home safely and not lose anything! I spend days, even weeks after a night out worrying about what may have happened that night, that I can't remember.... aren't these nights out supposed to be fun and all?!

Saying all that, it is my University Summer Ball on Saturday, and I am really looking forward to having this last event with my boyfriend since he graduates this year. I am not letting alcohol ruin this night for me, so I am only restricting myself to a few drinks. Just need to find a dress still.... and that is another nightmare in itself! 

GOODBYE excessive unnecessary alcohol, I won't miss you.

Thank you for reading, sorry for my little rambling spree... once you start I guess you can't stop! I hope you enjoyed this post... I am not completely ditching alcohol but I am 10000000% reducing my drink on nights out. I think I will be a much happier, chirpier, less anxious person for doing so. Can you relate to anything in this post?

Lots of Love,

Kayleigh xoxo

*PS I love all your support, please don't make me cry in the comments!!* 
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16 comments

  1. Great post Kayleigh! I have seen it all where alcohol is concerned and how it changes people but please remember that you really are soooooo lovely and one of the nicest people i have ever come across and i am certain i am not the only one who thinks this! Hope you have a wonderful time at your summer ball and i must also say that your bf is a lucky guy to have you xx

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  2. Brave post. I knew something was upsetting you on Sat, you weren't as happy as the first time I met you. Try to forgive yourself, like you'd forgive someone else. Be as kind to Kayleigh as you are to others x

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  3. Wonderful post! When I first started drinking, i'd do so very often but as I get older I find I don't even like to drink at all! Cutting out the excessive drinking is a wonderful choice!! If it doesn't make you feel good about yourself, you're doing the right thing by stopping :)

    Renee | Lose The Road

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  4. Lovely to read post! Brave.



    With Love,
    Anna || Curly Scribbles


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  5. This post is brilliant, self analysing can be difficult but you are taking the steps in the right direction. You can totally have fun without drinking to much! I have to say its lovely to see someone taking responsibility for their actions (regarding your boydriend) its truly a strength to work on yourself for not only you but others around you xxxx

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  6. Great post, I love reading posts like this :}

    I did the same thing - cut down on alcohol and stopped mixing drinks - and you'll feel so much better for it. Drunk me gets really irrational, over emotional and needy haha she's a right menace. Some nights I had drinking were amazing, but it was the day after that was the worst. I hate not being able to recall things and not feeling in control. Not being able to remember what happened the night before used to make my anxiety go through the ROOF; thinking 'what if?' and worrying I'd done something wrong, particularly with regards to stuff I'd say to my other half too. I've had some great nights sober or with very little drink and it just made me realise, I only drank so much before to give myself the confidence I should always have had.

    Once again, great post and hats off to you girly :}

    xx www.lovelaughslipstick.com xx

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  7. Kayleigh! First of all love you so so much! Secondly, this post couldn't have come at a better time (you know how friday night went for me too -.-) ever since I have been contemplating going tee total because I just don't think I can cope with the awful affects alcohol can have on memory and the dangerous situations it can put us in. But then you're right, I do love girly cocktail nights and I don't want to miss out on these so it's all about cutting out the excessive drinking. Definitely need to do this. So much love hun and I hope you're feeling better. I will see you at the ball :D (I too have yet to find a dress haha) xxxxxxxx

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  8. I love how honest this post is, definitely takes a lot of courage to be that honest :) Personally I'm actually tee-total so I can't really relate to this because I've never been drunk or really drunk very much at all but I definitely think it's a good thing to cut down to a healthy amount so you don't wake up with an awful hangover. For me it's really strange seeing my friends when they're drunk (and I'm sober) because sometimes they can really act out of character. Anyway I admire you a lot for doing this post lovely x

    vvnightingale.com

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  9. Haha this is exactly how I feel too! Hopefully when you see me at Leeds Ball I'll be super sober and super sensible! Good luck x x x x

    Mojichlo

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  10. hope you have a brilliant time with your boyfriend at the ball! Lessening the amount you will drink will ensure you have an amazing time with your boyfriend and make some beautiful memories!! XXX

    Anisha ♥ All You Need Is Red Lipstick

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  11. I had an epiphany too! Not drank for about 3 years now except a little tipple at Xmas. You don't want to know the event that brought me to the decision but it was truly mortifying :( Great post & congrats on 800!! Xxx

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  12. I totally agree with this. If i go out like i used to it takes me the entire weekend to get over it. I think its an age thing, i don't really want to go out and drink now because i've been there and done that.
    Don't get me wrong i still love a few cheeky cocktails but even after the odd drink i can still tell this next morning these days.

    Chelsea x
    chelseapotter.co.uk

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  13. Great post - I have had my share of these awful days, when I hated myself for the things I did/said when I was drunk. I almost convinced myself I am a truly bad person. But I know I am not - I was just hurting and trying to blow out some steam. You are not a bad person! You had a bad moment - thats all.
    xx
    M.
    http://nevermindnm.blogspot.com/

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  14. What a lovely and open post. Im 26 and i use to drink so so much, every weekend. I would never remember things and i was out of control, i decided that i didnt need alcohol to have fun and the last time i got drunk was probably over a year ago. going out and having a few drinks feel incredible, i can still have a good time and i will feel great the next morning! i think there just comes a time in one's life where alcohol takes a step backward x

    Leanne's Lifestyle Blog

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  15. Love this post, this is something that has been playing on my mind a lot too, maybe it's to do with age that we just don't enjoy it the same. I quite late to comment on this but I hope everything has been much better since cutting down!

    Www.racheleiwood.blogspot.com

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  16. After starting university, I went out 3-4 times a week for the first couple of weeks.. and I'm actually happy to say that the experience of feeling like crap all the time, and some of the stuff I don't remember happening.. I weren't enjoying it. I'll do the occasional night out at home with friends, but I'm happy to say going out drinking isn't something that appeals to me anymore. Warm nights in, with a hot chocolate seems far more appealing to me.

    Katie - http://allprettyclassic.com

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